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Post by ShadyRounds on May 25, 2017 15:56:23 GMT -5
That's not a critique I can give though, just a compliment. I like that it includes it, I can't suggest anything in the way of it because it already does anything I could think to ask of it. My critique, is that it's impressive and I can't really see any problems, else I'd be sure to bring them up.
I don't know about Rule 1, obviously don't be a Sonic fan about it, and it follows well for this piece, but I wouldn't think it'd break good writing as long as it fits. Do prefer cameos, however, and an interesting plot interpretation or lane-change that leads back on track later, is really exciting.
EDIT: Actually, I can think of a single thing now that I'm pretty deep into it, relating to "webpage function". I didn't notice it until now, and it doesn't seem to bug me, but it's "read right to left", yet the "next page" arrow "progresses to the right". I don't mind it, and it took me a long while to even realize it. Suggest no action, just a quirk I've recognized.
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Post by HF on May 30, 2017 7:37:07 GMT -5
That's not a critique I can give though, just a compliment. I like that it includes it, I can't suggest anything in the way of it because it already does anything I could think to ask of it. My critique, is that it's impressive and I can't really see any problems, else I'd be sure to bring them up. I don't know about Rule 1, obviously don't be a Sonic fan about it, and it follows well for this piece, but I wouldn't think it'd break good writing as long as it fits. Do prefer cameos, however, and an interesting plot interpretation or lane-change that leads back on track later, is really exciting. I appreciate the feedback, thanks! The thing about OCs is that there isn't really any purpose in adding them due to an already well-established cast of characters (which is already ripe for expanding upon instead of shoehorning new cast members just for the sake of it). I would always prefer to add new content into the story to keep things fresh, but I honestly see no reason to add OCs at this point. In fact, adding original characters needlessly means having to flesh them out, taking up more time in the form of additional pages between point A and point B. With so much to focus on with the main cast and the story already, adding more non-critical elements would be more disruptive than productive. I hope this clears things a little more. Thanks again for your support! Update: New page is ready!What, you guys expected a fake-out with Roll staying in the car?
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Post by MegaTuga on May 30, 2017 8:18:05 GMT -5
The gun's name "Mathilda" eh... Also who is that? I don't recall any character with that sexy hairstyle...
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Post by HF on May 30, 2017 8:27:07 GMT -5
The gun's name "Mathilda" eh... "Mathilda" (pronounced the same as Matilda) is an alternate spelling for the same name, though I took this opportunity to name it after both the burst-fire handgun from Resident Evil 4 (and others) and the female lead played by a young Natalie Portman in the film "Leon: The Professional". You like ponytail? We all like ponytail.
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Post by Dashe on May 30, 2017 14:22:49 GMT -5
Eh? It's the gun's name? I figured someone took a label maker and tried to designate it as Matilda Caskett's, but goofed on the spelling.
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Post by HF on May 30, 2017 18:15:36 GMT -5
Eh? It's the gun's name? I figured someone took a label maker and tried to designate it as Matilda Caskett's, but goofed on the spelling. Apparently, "Matilda" or "Mathilda" both originate from old German for "Maht" and "Hild" meaning Strength and Battle. A bit of a coincidence at the time of writing, but it does seem meaningful for a weapon upgrade of sorts. Think I should revert back?
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Post by Rockman Striker on May 30, 2017 20:45:03 GMT -5
I love badass Roll, I remember I used to draw her using her automatic-wrench/handgun as seen in concept art, and I see you took inspiration from it too. Also, I believe that using 'Mathilda' as the gun's name is appropriate to avoid confusion with the name of her mother.
-"So, your gun has the same name as your mom?" -"No, can't you see the 'H' in the middle?"
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Post by Dashe on May 30, 2017 22:45:04 GMT -5
Yeah, what Striker just said. That quote gag is pretty funny, too. I'm just not sure Rock would notice the gun has the same name as her mother.
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Post by HF on May 31, 2017 0:27:15 GMT -5
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Post by ShadyRounds on May 31, 2017 7:55:00 GMT -5
I prefer the Blackbird for sake of cost-per-efficiency. Ask for slightly varied spelling, I noticed that with the "Casquet" name to begin with. I appreciated the situation even then, making it fancy and more developed even then. This is just second verse same as the first, little bit louder and a whole lot worse.
Ask for OC, would you say, if you were writing for the beginning of Megaman itself, and were writing from the very beginning of "Robert Institute of Technology" even as you are now, would you say given the vagueness of the origins story of "Light" and "Wiley", would you say it's appropriate to add characters to their graduation? Some cameos to Dr. Cossiac? Some filler characters that are made up on the spot?
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Post by HF on May 31, 2017 10:54:55 GMT -5
Ask for slightly varied spelling, I noticed that with the "Casquet" name to begin with. I appreciated the situation even then, making it fancy and more developed even then. This is just second verse same as the first, little bit louder and a whole lot worse. Despite what most people I have talked to seem to think, I did not make those surnames up. Though it did inspire me to go that direction, the alternate spellings originated from the RMD2 instruction manual for PSP. "Crowd Filler" do not count as "OCs" in the context you raised because they are literally just that: extras to create and fill a crowd. They do not interact with the main characters on an individual level, and only exist because a story setting requires it. Using your example, it does not matter who those people in the crowd are (and even the ones presenting said graduation) because their sole purpose is to serve as part of the background for the main focus of the story: "Dr. Light and Dr. Wily's Graduation". With that said, I am not convinced that OCs would be of any meaningful contribution to the story I want to tell. The entire Megaman franchise goes beyond video games, and spans across all sorts of media including comics (straight adaptations, gag series etc.), cartoons, collectible cards, and so forth. Because of this, I am confident that sticking to non-narrative cameos (if at all) will not only be more meaningful as a form of affectionate self-parody, but more appreciated by those reading it.
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Post by ShadyRounds on Jun 3, 2017 6:52:46 GMT -5
What about "Filler"? Will we see the small ruin exploration, game show minigames, or side missions for the Inspector or Hospital? Seems like it'd be a lot of work, was more curious thinking about it at work (yes I've no life I'm pathetic I know )
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Post by HF on Jun 3, 2017 23:59:08 GMT -5
What about "Filler"? Will we see the small ruin exploration, game show minigames, or side missions for the Inspector or Hospital? Seems like it'd be a lot of work, was more curious thinking about it at work That would depend mostly on whether they serve any purpose to the story. At best the 'filler' segments from the original game would be to aid pacing in storytelling, though I would like to stick to the main story as much as possible. As Dashe and I have discussed before in this thread (I think), it would be outright boring to watch Rock go every small detail of his trek through the ruins for an entire 30 or so pages (which unfortunately translates to a very boring year as that's how long it would take due to my personal schedule). It doesn't mean I would outright ignore them though, because I would still like to pack in as much as I could (at the very least give them a shout-out implying they exist or events have already happened). But just to answer this question: If there is one subquest I want to cover, it would have to be the hospital one with Ira. I do appreciate the feedback, and I'm happy to answer any questions and get discussion going, so it's all good!
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Post by ShadyRounds on Jun 5, 2017 3:31:31 GMT -5
I do appreciate the feedback, and I'm happy to answer any questions and get discussion going, so it's all good! I appreciate the response. I was actually mentioning me thinking of this stuff at work. Having no train of thought except this, is why I write script in my head, I come up with script a lot in my head at work, and why the creative buildup of making stuff with the script is almost painful. Why think of the comic and the sidequests? Because why not, my brain says, as I'm doing menial tasks. To be fair, MMLA covered filler all in one grindy episode. Worked for humor sake. Your proposal to cover it in short flashback, cutaway, or introduction that implies a skip in time and acquisition of new parts from a lesser ruin, is a very good idea from a anime/manga perspective. It's essentially how most main characters work in Hunter x Hunter, and I love that to death. It's also warm-and-fuzzy of you to want to cover the hospital one in comic realtime. Such a feel-good event.
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Post by HF on Jun 6, 2017 5:47:59 GMT -5
To be fair, MMLA covered filler all in one grindy episode. Worked for humor sake. Your proposal to cover it in short flashback, cutaway, or introduction that implies a skip in time and acquisition of new parts from a lesser ruin, is a very good idea from a anime/manga perspective. It's essentially how most main characters work in Hunter x Hunter, and I love that to death. Think of it this way: If everything needs to be covered it would be simply boring to read through literal storyboards of what happens in half an hour of MML1 gameplay, let alone over the course of a year or so. Update: New page is up early, and so Chapter 4 has now concluded! The detailed plot outline for Chapter 5 has been completed, and draftwork for each page has begun. Hopefully I would have something to show after I catch up with my other work and personal life for a bit. Once again thanks to everyone who spent time reading through this web-manga, nitpicked at it, and offered feedback for this personal project!
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