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Post by Kyle on Feb 3, 2014 21:09:48 GMT -5
Though I had no true interest in the realm of sport,
My selling of the Seahawks was none other than short,
Although loath was I to watch these men from the state of rain,
There'd be no greater satisfaction than seeing that duo in pain,
But, alas, my goal was snatched out of sight,
By "star player" Manning, who preformed extremely shite,
To this end, I leave only these words,
Eff' you, Seahawks, the shittiest of birds.
(You're welcome, Dashe.)
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Post by Dashe on Feb 3, 2014 21:52:28 GMT -5
At the start of the 2013 handegg season.
I'd claimed I'd invested no interest therein.
I had but one caveat here, within reason,
I just didn't want those damned Seahawks to win!
I thought it'd be viable, that one request,
Since those Handegg teams numbered, what, thirty-two strong?
How likely could it be that they'd be the best?
They couldn't be that good! But boy, was I wrong.
For game after game those dorks came out on top,
But I held my resolve through the post-season talks.
When into our discourse the superbowl'd crop,
I'd say "I only hope that it's not the Seahawks."
Murphy's Law was in full force that sad Sunday night
That cold February in 2014.
Those evil birds slaughtered, a tedious sight,
Like some Handegg-game-slaughtering sportsy machine.
So should you approach me on one of your flings
And I'm looking depressed or a bit out of sorts,
I'll exclaim, "How do I wind up crushed by these things!?"
And insist that you DON'T GET INVESTED IN SPORTS!!!
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Post by Chiz on Feb 4, 2014 4:06:13 GMT -5
The handeggers come out richer;
Win or lose, they've earned their pays.
As too did the sponsors, which're
selling as if it's the holidays.
Franchise owners got their money,
The media got a fair chunk, too.
Bookies got some of that sweet honey,
and the government likely got their due.
But while it seems that all came out
with rewards bursting at the seams,
the great loser is the poor devout,
the crushed fans of the handegg teams.
But don't pity them, for while it's bleak
and they really ought to give it up
Just watch their actions in 8 weeks
during the PLAYOFFS FOR THE STANLEY CUP.
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