My first Legends Fan-fic!

[megadaffy]

Here's my first Legends fan-fic. Enjoy!

MegaDaffy (me) meets Mega Man

“All right! I finally got a copy of Mega Man 64!” I said as I entered my house, “I can’t wait to play it!” I continued. I then inserted the game cartridge into my N64 and turned on my T.V. “Alright here we go!” I said as I turned on my N64 and grabbed the controller sitting next to my N64 and sat down on the couch, waiting for the game to start up. However, Nothing happened except the cartridge turned green and started glowing. “Hmm, I better call GameStop about this.” I thought as I got up to get the phone, which was upstairs. Suddenly right as I reached the door to the stairs, the room lighted up and I felt a mysterious force sucking me away from the door, I grabbed onto the couch and held on as tight as I could. But, whatever was pulling me in was stronger than me, so eventually I lost my grip and got sucked into the game.
When I woke up, I was somewhere dark and had an “ancient” look to it. I decided to walk down the halls and see if I could get a better clue of where I was. I was then suddenly attack by a one eyed robot. “A Reaverbot…” I told myself, it then attacked me again. “Alright, I’ll take you on! I have to warn you though, I’ve played Street Fighter and Tekken!” I told it as I got into my fighting stance. It didn’t say anything; it just ran right into me. Luckily, I dodged it and then ran towards and punched it. It didn’t affect it, I then tried to kick it, nothing happened. It then tried to throw a bomb at me but I punched it in the eye, which then cracked a little and then glowed. It then threw its bomb and that hit me. I lay there with scrapes all over, most likely from the shrapnel released by the bomb. The Reaverbot then came closer to me, I tried to get up but couldn’t. He almost attacked and could have killed me, considering the condition I was in. Suddenly, a laser blast from somewhere hit it and knocked it over, I tried to get up and look around to see who shot that laser blast and then I saw my hero standing in the distance. He walked toward me and asked if I was OK. I said I was and he went back to shooting the Reaverbot that was attacking me.
The Reaverbot then exploded into a couple pieces of Zenny and a cube. He collected them all and then ran over to me.

“Hey, are you O.K.? He asked.

“I…I think so.” I replied.

“Don’t worry, I’ll bring back you back with me.” He said.

“Thanks, Mega Man.” I said.

“No Problem.” Mega Man replied.

I was brought back to where Mega Man lived and healed there. I lied in a bed for who knows how long. However when I woke up, Mega Man was right there beside me.

“Hey buddy, You O.K.” He asked.

“Yeah, Thanks!” I replied.

“No Problem. Hey, how did you know my name?” Mega Man asked.

“I’ve played your games before.” I replied, “You’re my Hero.” I added.

To Be Continued...

[GustaffGlyde]

Not bad, not bad. And here I was expecting something like, “And I took on a horde of reaverbots without getting a scratch and blah blah balh! Look at me! I’m invincible!” Fortunately, you did quite the opposite. You actually made yourself human. So long as you don’t make this into an “I’m god incarnate and Roll, Yuna, Sera, and Tron worship me!” story that so many self-centric stories do, I think you’ll do fine.

One thing that you could do is not placing “Blah” he said and she said, “Meh”. You do need to do this at first, but you needn’t do it afterwards unless there are more than two people or it’s to show a change in emotion. As that all probably came out wrong, I’ll give an example…

“Hey, are you O.K.?” he saked

“I…I think so” I replied.

“Don’t worry, I’ll bring back you back with me.”

“Thanks, Mega Man.”

“No Problem.”

Basically, since only two people are talking, and we can assume you aren’t talking to yourself, the “said”s and “replied”s aren’t really necessary. Now, if you wanted to add emotion then having the saids is fine. Another thing that you should do is expand on things a little more. Writing is like painting a picture or playing a song. If you only use the black and white or you try to play a symphony with only five people you’re going to have trouble. Put some meat on those bones… er, sentences, as they would say.

Just because I’m bored, I expanded on that last part where everything was very brief as an example. Actually, I was only going to go on for the first couple of lines, but I just kept going and going and… ahem, sort of lost control. Rambling powers… Anyways, this is just my take on it so when you go back and rewrite this part (I’m guessing this is just a first draft after all) do what you want.

Expanding on MD's story, which is his orginal idea... except for MM and co.

“Hey, are you O.K.?” he asked, a somewhat worried look crossing his face as he asked, followed by a smile as he extended his hand and helped me back to my feet.

“I…I think so.” I replied in a shaky voice as I returned to my feet. It had all happened so quickly, no more than ten minutes I’d assume, and yet in such a short fleeting of time a series of events had been put into motion that could very well have altered not only my future, but that of my hero, Megaman.

The young digger, as they are known, clad in his signature blue armour motioned to me to follow. “Don’t worry, I’ll bring back you back with me” he said confidently, his eyes ever alert for any signs of reaverbot life as we began to head down the halls.

I began to follow through the dark ruins, but as I followed a sharp pang in my leg began to grow worse and worse. I looked down to see what the source of the pain was… I wished I hadn’t. A piece of shrapnel had apparently lodged itself into my foot, and the flow of blood was beginning to worsen. A sense of worry crossed my mind as I stopped and leaned against the ice-cold wall, my body growing feint. Everything went dark for a moment, but as I awoke I noticed I had began moving again.

At first I feared that some fell reaverbot had captured me, but much to my relief I found that I was being carried by Megaman. “Thanks… MegaMan” I muttered, my head still feeling the effects of the loss of blood.

”No problem” he said, a sense of urgency permeated his voice as the faint sounds of clanking metal could be heard in the distance. MegaMan began to increase his pace as I tried in vain to see what was behind us, but even so I knew in the back of my head what it was. “Reaver… bots…” I mumbled. The sound grew louder, and the darkness of unconsciousness began to envelop me once more.

It was some time later that I woke up. I had no idea where I was at first, but I soon realized that the room I was in was that of MegaMan’s, aboard the Flutter. As I awoke, I noticed a small monkey, Data was his name if I recall correctly, squeaking in a fast and high-pitched gibberish. I soon noticed Megaman standing in the doorway. He was wearing a yellow apron as he placed a tray of food on a small table placed next to the bed.

“Hey, you feeling better?” he asked as he poured a glass of orange juice. I didn’t reply at first, instead gazing at the plate of plump sausage, scrambled eggs, and two small biscuits that were as fluffy as clouds. It had been quite a while since I had last ate, or so my stomach told me, so I quickly inhaled a piece of sausage and gulped down some of the juice. “I’m fine… and thanks Megaman” I replied after swallowing.

Megaman smiled, obviously delighted that the food wasn’t going to waste. “Hey, no problem…” He paused for a brief moment before continuing. “But how do you know my name?”

I had nearly cleared the plate by this time, but I paused and eagerly replied, “From the MegaMan legends games, of course. I’ve played them all! In fact, you’re my favorite hero!”

Well, yeah. I have habit of rambling. But basically, just expand and elaborate on things a bit more so your audience can get a good idea of what’s happening. You’re doing very well so far, so keep up the good work. Of course, I’m not the best of writers, especially around here, so I’d see what people like BM 1-3, Fire Griffin, and aarond have to say as they’re some of the best we have.

Just don’t get discouraged. Even if it doesn’t turn out well, you can always go back and change things, and you’ll learn from the experience and get better. The more work you put into it, the better it’ll get, so just keep at it. I’d be interested in seeing how it all turns out. Well, until your next update I suppose…

…

Anyways, as for the story in the long run, will whatever caused you to be drawn into the Legends universe have any affect on the story? Like something/someone did something that caused a break in dimensions which caused the cartridge to act as a portal or… uh… something like that? Eh, maybe you could tie it into the Elder’s reactivation (unless this story takes place pre-MML2 instead of post-MML2). Or maybe it could be due to one of Roll’s inventions. Heck, maybe you could rewrite the intro a bit. MM finds a strange machine in the ruins and decides to bring Roll to check it out, seeing as he can’t bring it to her. She begins to fool with it and it activates and is responsible for pulling you into their dimension.

Another idea could be that the Elder’s are trying to bring someone back from the past. Our world is really the past of the MML world basically. Whoever it is (someone from a previous MM series) doesn’t get pulled into the future, but you do. Then you could have MM vs. the Elders as your basic storyline and go from there.

Either way, you’ll probably want to sketch out the events of the story before you start writing, so it’d be best to decide on this stuff first. Eh, but it’s getting late so I’ll stop here. Good luck to you (and make sure to listen to the others that I mentioned if they chose to respond. Their advice will be far better than mine, I can assure you.)

[Buster Cannon]

Pretty nice. If Paragon were here I'd tell him to take notes. Also, GustaffGlyde's suggestion is pretty good, maybe you should give it a shot. Keep up the good work, I'm eager to hear the next part of your fanfic.

[PharaohManXe54]

Yeah, I agree entirely with GG. "I was brought back to where Mega Man lived and healed there. I lied in a bed for who knows how long. However when I woke up, Mega Man was right there beside me. " could be beefed up a WHOLE lot. Add a description of the Flutter. Add how he healed you. Make a time period up. Otherwise, meh......

[megadaffy]

PharaohManXe54 said:

Yeah, I agree entirely with GG. "I was brought back to where Mega Man lived and healed there. I lied in a bed for who knows how long. However when I woke up, Mega Man was right there beside me. " could be beefed up a WHOLE lot. Add a description of the Flutter. Add how he healed you. Make a time period up. Otherwise, meh......

Wow! If that's the only complaint about this, then I'd say I'm doing pretty good.

[Paragon]

*taking notes* Awesome story! I think I'll go and edit my still-in-handwriting fanfic with this new stuff!